Stories have been around for generations. They can teach us right and wrong, about good and evil and steer us in the right direction. Metaphors are an indirect way to get the mind thinking and to influence behaviour. I love using stories in my work with both children and adults as profound changes can occur.

If you find that you're the kind of person who is easily influenced by others, I heard a story recently that is for you. So if you're sitting comfortably, I'll begin.

In an ancient time, long ago, an old man and his youngest son were taking their wares to market. It was a long walk from home but they were fortunate enough to have a donkey to carry their goods to sell. They had been walking for hours and as they were approaching the town, the old man could see that his son was tiring and so he told his son to climb on to the donkey for the last part of the journey.

They soon reached the market town, which was surrounded by walls with two guards standing either side of the arched entrance. As they passed through the archway, the guards whispered to each other, 'Look at that poor old man. He is tired and weary after a long journey, and yet his son rides the donkey. It is just not right'.

Hearing this, the man turned to his young son and instructed him to get down from the donkey and walk and he then climbed up onto the donkey. They continued on into the town and passed a cafe with tables outside on the street. At one of these tables sat a couple of old women, who watched them pass, saying 'That poor boy. His selfish father rides the donkey, whilst he is made to walk alongside with his tired little legs. It is just not right'.

The old man hears this and so he tells his son to also climb up on the donkey and sit in front of him. As they move away from the cafe, the cafe owner is standing in the doorway and says to himself, 'well that is just animal abuse. That poor old donkey, made to carry the old man, his son and all of their provisions. It's just not right.'

The old man once again overheard. He quickly got down from the donkey, lifted down his son and then unloaded all of the provisions onto his shoulders and those of his son. They continued on their journey to the market place in the centre of the town.

When they reached the market, the old man became aware of all of the other market stall holders laughing. They were laughing and pointing at him and his son and saying to each other 'Look at that old fool and his son. They have a donkey and they don't know how to use it! They are letting the donkey walk by itself whilst they carry all of the provisions. It's ridiculous.'

And the man realised that he truly had been foolish. He had been so busy listening to others and allowing them to influence his decisions that he had ended up carrying a heavy load for his donkey! He decided in that moment to trust his own judgement.

We have so many outside influences in our lives and the media is always telling us how we should be doing things. But we know best. With all of our resources, capability and experience we should feel empowered to go with our instinct and believe in the decisions that we make. People will always be quick to judge but that doesn't mean that we have to listen. Trust yourself.

If you wake in the morning and don't feel rested, it impacts your whole day. Any parents will know that their children are at their worst when they have not had a good night's sleep and as adults we are the same, even if we don't like to admit it.

Deep, restful sleep allows the body to regenerate and to process the day, so if you are not getting enough, these tips are for you.

1. Have a bedTIME and stick to it

Just like a baby, we operate best when we have structure to our day. Make bedtime the same time every night. There will be an optimal time for you to get the rest that your body needs, so if it's not working, try earlier or later times, being consistent for two weeks to allow your body to get into the rhythm.

2. Prepare for sleep

It is important to have a routine that prepares your body for rest. Binge watching Netflix and then expecting your mind to switch off to sleep is not ideal. It is recommended that all electronic stimulus is turned off for 30 minutes prior to bedtime. Take a shower, read a book, do something that allows your mind to slow down, allowing you to fall into an easy and natural sleep.

Also, bedrooms are for sleep and sex, so TVs belong in the living area.

3. Unload your thoughts

Your subconscious mind wants to help you resolve any problems, so if you go to bed with thoughts of work, or to do lists or worries about family members, your mind will run through scenarios to help you. So you lie in bed thinking, and thinking and thinking, probably resolving very little.

Before getting into bed at night, keep a notepad to the side and literally take any thoughts out of your head and put them down on paper. It doesn't need to make sense or be legible. Then once you have done this, put the notepad in a drawer, literally 'putting the thoughts away' until tomorrow. As an added bonus, the act of writing stimulates the logical side of your brain, which may help find a resolution.

4. Focus your mind

There's a reason that people count sheep to go to sleep. It focuses the mind on a single thing, preventing any random thoughts or worries from getting in. When you're lying in bed, here are some techniques to try.

Progressive Muscle Relaxation - starting at your feet, imagine relaxing the muscles in your toes, feet and ankles and then progress this upwards through your legs all the way to your face and finally your mind. The slower you do this the better. If you find it hard to 'think' relaxation, tense the muscle first.

Visualisation - everybody likes to remember happy times. Think of a place that you find peaceful and relaxing, perhaps a recent holiday. Try and immerse yourself in the memory, by recalling the colours and images, the sounds, smells and feelings that this place creates for you.

5. Be grateful

Studies show that people who practice gratitude on a regular basis sleep longer and feel more refreshed upon waking.

If you struggle with sleep, there is a tendency to focus on the negative, but the Law of Attraction says that if you think "I will never get to sleep" then you won't. Instead think, "I deserve a rest" or "I will get the rest that my body needs".

At the end of each day, write down three things to be thankful for. A hot coffee, or a green light on the way to work, or something funny one of your kids does or says. Identifying the good things will open your mind up to more joy and optimism and you will find more good things and rest better.

Most people find exam time stressful. For some, this stress can be a motivational tool that helps them knuckle down and study, but for many, the added pressure is simply too much and it affects their health.

Stress manifests in many ways, including:

- sleepless nights

- stomach trouble

- inability to concentrate or think straight

- dizziness, shortness of breath, or racing heart

- inability to control emotions - irritability or anger

Why does this happen to me?

When we are in an uncomfortable situation, our subconscious mind wants to protect us, so it triggers our 'Fight or Flight' instinct to encourage us to get away from there as soon as possible. We need this instinct in order to survive, but when it comes to situations where we don't have a choice, like exams, it's really not helpful.

The good news is that this is a learned response based on previous experience and your subconscious can just as easily learn a new response that supports you, rather than undermines your efforts. The following tips will help you to feel calm, relaxed and confident in the lead up to and during exams, allowing you to perform at your very best.

1. Preparation is key

If you know that you have done your best in preparing for your exams, there is no need to feel stressed. Set a study timetable, and keep to it. Your mind is most effective when it is concentrating on one thing at a time, so tune out any distractions. You can reward yourself with Facebook, TV, catching up with friends once your study is complete.

2. Treat your mind like a computer

Your mind is full of files and folders of information. In order to help it easily and quickly retrieve what is relevant, prior to each study session, close your eyes and imagine opening the relevant 'subject' folder in your mind. Visualise any information that you learn being stored in an orderly fashion within this folder. Then, at the beginning of the exam, you can imagine opening this folder to access what you need.

3. Stay calm and relaxed - just breathe

When your fight or flight instinct is triggered, your cognitive 'thinking' brain shuts down because your body wants you to put all your energy into getting away from harm. So whether it is attempting to learn new information, or recalling what you've learned, it becomes difficult to think straight.

A relaxed mind is more open, so the more that you can relax during study times and in the exams themselves, the more effective you will be. Focus on taking some deep breaths before you do anything else. Make your out breath longer than your in breath and breathe into your abdomen. I recommend 5/7 breathing - in for a count of 5 and out for a count of 7, but use whatever works for you.

4. Create a 'happy place'

Just bring to mind, right now, a time and place where you felt relaxed and happy. Perhaps it was on a holiday overseas, or perhaps somewhere local that you find calming. Once you have identified this place, just imagine yourself being there in that time. Make that memory as vivid as you can. Think about what you were doing, who you were with, the colours, the sounds. Think of how this place makes you feel. Your mind doesn't know the difference between what is real and what is imagined, so notice how calm you feel just by recalling that memory.

Use this technique prior to starting your studies, or just before the exam to take away the nervous energy and feel relaxed.

5. Take the pressure off

Your best is good enough. Period. There are no perfect people, only perfect intentions. If you set your intention to do your best, then you will. Everybody is unique so avoid comparing yourself to others as their approach and experiences will be totally different to yours.

6. This time will pass

Yes it feels uncomfortable right now, but this time is just a stage in a process and in a few months it will be very much in the past. Focus on the time after exams. Even if you don't know what your end goal is yet, just think about how good it will feel when the exams are behind you and you can look forward to what the future may bring.

I hope that these tips will bring some relief during this time. I often work with young people to help them manage their stress and anxiety, using hypnosis and mind management techniques to help you cope with the pressure and perform at your best.

If you feel like you need further assistance, call 0401 871476, email info@clarityhypnosis.com.au or message me through Facebook at Clarity Hypnosis Perth.

Around 40% of the population will make a resolution on 1st January 2017. The New Year brings with it the opportunity to leave the past behind and start afresh. This means that it is a great time for businesses to capitalise on this desire to change and market their programs. The diet and exercise industry, in particular, goes into overdrive, urging you to sign up with the mantra, “New Year, New You”!

But what does ‘new’ actually mean and how do we find a ‘new’ us?

The dictionary defines new as “produced, introduced, or discovered recently or now for the first time; not existing before”.

The key point here is ‘not existing before’ and this is why I dislike this whole idea of creating a brand new self, just because the calendar has turned over.

The only time we are ‘new’ is when we are born

We are all a product of our experience. Each and every one of us sees the world through a unique lens that has been shaped by everything that we have learned up to now. We can gain knowledge and learn skills, but fundamentally, the person that we are was decided long before we became susceptible to marketing.

Your subconscious mind is responsible for 88% of what you do

Your subconscious mind is that part of you that does everything for you that you don’t think about consciously. There is a commonly held belief that only 12% of our brain is our conscious thinking mind.

The role of your subconscious is to protect you and keep you safe, from controlling your heart beat to making you jump away from a hot stove.

A great example that I use with my clients is when you find yourself switching off whilst driving. Your conscious mind is thinking about work, or dinner, or the kids, so your subconscious mind drives the car and keeps you safe.

All of our behaviours are based on what we have experienced

When you fell off your bike, aged 5, and Mum gave you chocolate and you felt better, a part of your subconscious mind stored this for future reference. So now, when something brings you down, a little voice inside your head tells you that chocolate is the answer.

When you smoked your first cigarette, you were rebelling against authority, or being part of the gang and it was good, so you did it again. So in times of stress, our subconscious mind will pick up a box of cigarettes, take one out and light it before you even notice.

But what if I’m not happy with how I am?

This is where our subconscious lets us down, because when we decide that we want to make a change, the logic, reasoning and decision-making comes from our conscious mind.

Then there’s willpower, which is also part of our conscious mind. Willpower is about using our strength to stand up to the little voice that wants to keep those bad habits because it thinks they are in our best interests.

And relying on willpower is why so many resolutions fail.

With all the conscious will in the world, if your subconscious doesn’t want to do something, it won’t. It will whisper in your ear about how ‘just one more won’t hurt’ and tell you that you ‘deserve a treat’ and, given that it is 5 to 7 times more powerful than your conscious mind, eventually, most people give in.

Hypnosis is all about making your subconscious work with you, not against.

In the relaxing state of hypnosis, your subconscious starts to listen. A good hypnotherapist will use all of your motivations for wanting to change to make suggestions so that your subconscious realises that it is no longer working in your best interests and begins to support your goals, rather than undermining them.

It’s not a magic wand. You still need to consciously make the right decisions and engage your willpower until new habits become automatic, but it won’t feel like a battle, it will feel easy and natural.

Not a 'new you' or a 'better you' just a 'happy you'

Everything you need to make lasting change is right there inside you already. Sometimes it just needs a helping hand.

So here’s to my 2017 mantra: “New Year, Happy You!”

Depression can take on many forms, from just generally feeling blue to the point where medical intervention is required in order to get through the day.

When you're suffering with depression is very easy to become very negative in your thinking, relating a problem or issue in one area to other aspects of life until the future becomes very bleak. When you're in a downward spiral, perhaps much time is spent reflecting on the past and how things could or should have been different.

Hypnotherapy can work with your depression, helping to let go of any issues in the past and moving towards a more positive outlook, allowing you to shape the future that you want, instead of feeling like it is already decided for you.

It's about climbing out of the rut, reversing the spiral, or getting around the barriers by being able to leave things in the past that no longer serve you and finding new strategies to cope with anything life throws your way.

1 Focusing on the positive

Nobody wants to feel depressed. We want to feel happy, joyful, excited or simply content. Hypnotherapy helps that part of you that can only see a negative outcome to find an alternative reality that allows you to experience life with positive emotions.

2. Letting go of what's holding you back

There are things in the past for many of us that we may wish that we'd handled differently, not done, seen or heard. These things are like rocks that we accumulate in our backpack and carry around with us on our shoulders on a daily basis. When these rocks become too heavy a burden, they don't allow us to move forwards. In hypnosis you can allow yourself to let these things go, seeing them as just memories that no longer serve you.

3. Feel more rested and energised

If you are plagued by depressive thoughts and emotions, it is easy to wake up in the morning feeling like you have had little or no rest. As a result of letting go and starting to focus on the positives, your mind can switch off more easily and get the rest that you need. Hypnotherapy is all about promoting the body's own ability to rest and relax. It can help improve the depth of sleep so that you can wake with more energy and feel more able to cope with what the day has in store.

4. Get you exercising

Being more rested helps you feel more inclined to get your body moving. Hypnotherapy can help you feel motivated to become physically active by visualising the positive outcomes on both your body and your mind.

Research shows that exercise compares favorably to antidepressant medications as a first-line treatment for mild to moderate depression and has also been shown to improve depressive symptoms when used as an adjunct to medications.

If you are concerned about symptoms of depression, it is important that you consult with your doctor prior to seeking alternative therapy, but if you would like to know more about how hypnotherapy could help you, call 0401 871476 for a free consultation.

Summer is on its way and its time to get our sluggish bodies out of hibernation and get used to enjoying being outdoors and active again.

If you need a little more convincing, here are just a few reasons why exercise is such a necessary part of life:

1) It makes you feel good

Exercise releases endorphins – the ‘happy’ hormones, which have an analgesic effect on the body and also give buzzy feeling, often described as a ‘runner’s high’. Research shows that exercise compares favourably to antidepressants as a first line treatment for mild to moderate depression.

2) It helps alleviate anxiety

If you’re feeling anxious it is because your mind has triggered your ‘fight or flight’ instinct and is basically readying your body to attack or run away. One of the best ways to alleviate anxiety is to allow your body that physical outlet that it’s looking for. Making time in your week for regular exercise can reduce stress levels overall by increasing concentrations of norepinephrine, the chemical that moderates the brain’s response to stress.

3) It gets you out in nature

If you can take your workout outside, there’s an extra boost. Studies show that being out in nature can actually boost your immune system by putting your body in ‘rest and digest’ mode, the opposite of ‘fight or flight’. Connecting with nature is a basic human need, reconnecting your body and your mind in a powerful way.

4) It exercises your brain as well as your body

It’s well known that our ability to remember things deteriorates with age. Physical activity enhances learning and memory for people of all ages by triggering brain cell growth.

5) It helps you achieve more and be more creative

When your brain is struggling to tune in to the daily grind, exercise can help. Research on workers who incorporated exercise into the working week showed an increase in productivity vs those who did not exercise.

It has also been proven to boost creativity for up to two hours afterwards!

But if all the reasons in the world are still not getting you off the couch, here are a few tips to help make it easier to get up and get going:

1) Schedule the time in your calendar as an appointment - you’ll be more likely to keep it.

2) , instead of how hard it is to get there. Focusing on the positive outcome is motivational.

3) Workout with a friend as it will meet your basic need for social interaction, makes the exercise more enjoyable and keeps you honest!

We're doing some minor renovations at the moment. Feeling my pain? I'm spending a lot of time painting and, in doing so, I'm spending a lot of time in my own head. It's a time consuming process, but strangely satisfying and it's taught me a few things along the way that are so applicable to so many things that we do.

1 Preparation is key

There's nothing like a fresh coat of paint on a wall to show up all of the lumps and bumps! Just considering the process, rather than rushing in headlong, could actually save time and increase productivity.

This applies to so many things in life. Assessing what's required, ensuring that the right tools and resources are in place and having a clear plan of action delivers the right result.

Elite athletes use mental rehearsal for performance and researchers conclude that it may help create the same 'neural processes' as when the activity is for real.

So next time that you're doing something challenging, make sure that you set aside the time to work things out in your head, or on paper. This will allow your mind to visualise where you want to be and to set a course for how you get there.

2 You can't cover over the cracks

Refer point 1. Trying to cut corners when you're renovating really doesn't work in the long term. The same area was painted a couple of years ago and the cracks show through.

We have an amazing ability to compartmentalise the different roles we play in life. Like leaving work at the office, or having a grown up conversation, rather than with your toddler. This ability allows us to manage all of the tasks that we are juggling. Psychology calls it a 'coping strategy'.

However, it is important to ensure that you are setting something to one side to deal with later, not pushing things out altogether, because they are too painful or difficult to deal with. Soldiers who have experienced trauma often find that it comes back to haunt them, in the form of PTSD and some people find that they can actually trap things in their body, resulting in physical pain. If there is something that you're unable to deal with on your own, ask for help.

3 Nobody sees things the way you do

Renovations create friction. Enough said.

We all see the world through a different lens and everybody's version of reality is unique based on their values and belief system. If you disagree with someone, take the time to consider their point of view and literally 'where they are coming from', i.e., their background. It will help you understand why they have that particular stance and what you can do to change it.

4 White is not always white

Repainting a white wall white really illustrates how things fade over time.

It's easy to become jaded with hobbies or interests. When you do something for the first time it's shiny and new and brilliant. But once you've done that same thing over and over, it becomes repetitive and dull. If you feel the need to reinvigorate something that you used to enjoy, just take some time to re-engage with why you took it up in the first place. Also, find a new way to challenge yourself, either through learning something new or applying your skills in a totally new way.

5 Going over old ground often makes things worse

At some things, I like to think of myself as a perfectionist and I've discovered that this applies to painting. I've made the mistake of trying to touch up semi-dried paint and made it much, much worse.

Evolution is all about learning from mistakes, so it is natural for us to check our actions and determine whether we could do something better. However, when doing so makes us self critical leading to a negative outlook, it can be more damaging than productive.

If you find yourself prone to self talk (internal voice) over something that has just happened, just assess whether your criticism is constructive and will help you avoid making a similar mistake, or whether its unrealistic and unkind. If its the latter, just consider the words that are being said and then imagine these same words in the voice of Mickey Mouse, even saying them out loud. Putting an amusing spin on something can make it seem ridiculous and help you to be kinder to yourself.

6 Sometimes you need to call in the experts

I don't like admitting my limitations. I like to think I can turn my hand to most things. But investing hours in something that a professional could do in a lot less time, and a lot better than I can, is not fulfilling and it was like a weight off my shoulders to admit this!

Be aware of your own limitations in life. Specialists are trained to deal with those things that we cannot do by ourselves, like tax returns or fixing a bad back. If there is something that is currently holding you back in life and preventing you from becoming the best that you can be, there are trained specialists that can help, as wonderfully articulated by a recent client of mine:

"If there's something that keeps coming up that you can't fix by yourself, hypnotherapy can make a huge difference."

Call 0401 871476 for a free consultation.

Who knew that watching paint dry could offer such enlightenment :)

A few years ago, I used to be terrified about speaking in public and in particular talking on the telephone. This was a bit of an occupational hazard as a receptionist in a busy office. But more often than not, I would allow calls to go to voicemail and spend my days picking up messages, effectively doubling my workload.

In this day and age, much can be achieved by text and email, so the phone conversations are dwindling, but there are many people who also feel paralysed by fear if they have to give presentations or speak in meetings.

The power of personal contact with colleagues, a prospective client or supplier should not be underestimated. I've now conquered my fear of the phone and it's actually something that I enjoy, so here are my tips to stop you shying away from public speaking and to increase your confidence.

1. Visualise a supremely confident you

Successful athletes use visualisation to see themselves winning and achieving their goals. So, just imagine or get a sense or feeling of yourself days or weeks in the future when you are confidently speaking in public, whether it's on the phone, in a meeting or giving a presentation.

Have a really good look at this future you. What do you notice about your posture, the way you're speaking and how the people you're speaking to are responding? We learn by repetition, so the more times that you can do this exercise, the more the fear will subside.

2. Use positive self talk

All too often we tell ourselves 'I can't' and if I can't, I don't try. But we never had this attitude as a child, or we would never have developed skills such as riding a bike. We are all just doing the best that we can with what we've been given, so be your own internal cheerleader and be kinder to yourself. 'I can do this!'

3. Rehearse your presentation / conversation

There are lots of reasons to rehearse. Firstly, it gives you a plan as to what you want to say, secondly, it allows you to anticipate any feedback or potential questions from the person that you're speaking with and thirdly it helps you to visualise a successful outcome.

If I'm needing to convey an important message, I will frequently write myself a script to ensure that I cover all of the points. I will also read it aloud to hear how it sounds.

4. Don't forget to breathe

Just before you go into that meeting, or pick up that phone, put your hand on your belly and take a couple of really deep breaths, making sure that your belly rises. Also try to make your out breath longer than your in breath (eg breathe in for a count of 5, and out for a count of 7). When we're stressed, our breathing becomes shallow and slowing your breathing down will release those feelings of panic.

5. Recognise the part of you that wants to protect you

So many of us with fears and phobias feel that we're being irrational. But, at some point in the past, you may have had a bad experience (losing words, stuttering, or a negative outcome).

There's a part of you that exists within your subconscious mind that wants to protect you. This part triggers your 'fight or flight' instinct which creates the feelings of stress. It's only after we have this response that our thinking brain kicks in and we start to question the feelings - too late to stop them happening.

By using all of the above steps you can retrain your subconscious to realise that it's now in your best interests to handle these situations confidently and without fear.

The Virtual Gastric Band, pioneered in the UK by Sheila Granger, has been successfully helping clients achieve their weight loss goals since 2010. If you're looking to improve your health, change your eating habits for the long term and become the body shape that you desire, here's why this is the programme for you:

1. It's not a diet

We all know diets don't work in the long term. You lose weight by restricting food groups or counting calories and then, once you stop, those kilos creep back on again until you're back to where you started, or worse, even heavier!

The Virtual Gastric Band is not a diet. It's about how you eat, not what you eat.

2. You can eat what you like

You really can! The Virtual Gastric Band programme is designed to help you feel satisfied on smaller amounts of food and people have shown steady, progressive weight loss whilst still being able to eat all of the foods that they enjoy.

3. It doesn't take over your life

Anyone who has been on a diet knows that it can be all consuming, whether it's making meal plans, shopping for diet foods, jumping on the scales at various times of day, or trying not to think about the forbidden foods that taste so good.

There is something called the Law of Attraction, which happens when you focus your energy on something. For example, if you're in the market for a new car, all you see is the vehicle type that you're interested in. Or if you're a new mum, all you see is other mums and their children. Where focus goes, energy flows. If you keep thinking 'I must not eat chocolate', your brain hears 'chocolate' and you will think about chocolate far more than before!

The Virtual Gastric Band programme is designed to make healthy eating something you don't need to think about - you just do it naturally. And because it's about how you feel in yourself and in your clothes, you don't even have to weigh.

4. It's for the long term

The issue with any weight loss programme is that you're relying on your willpower and determination in order to succeed. However, most of our behaviours in relation to food come from our childhood. Each time you fell down and somebody gave you chocolate to make you feel better, or you were told to finish everything on your plate because of starving children somewhere in the world, you established patterns in your eating habits.

Any attempt to change these eating habits 'consciously' is therefore a challenge to a pattern that feels as uncomfortable as brushing your teeth with your opposite hand.

The Virtual Gastric Band programme replaces these old eating habits with new patterns and changes behaviour for the long term.

5. It motivates you to exercise

To keep your body fit and active, it's important to exercise. The Virtual Gastric Band programme will help encourage you to get your body moving in ways that you enjoy and make regular exercise a part of your ongoing routine.

To finally achieve your weight loss goals, call Kathryn on 0401 871 476.

All of us at one time has experienced an inner critic - the nagging voice that tells you that you should have done better in that presentation, berates you for being 'stupid' when you make a mistake, or sows the seed of doubt when starting something new.

The 'critic' can be motivating, such as when you set out deliberately to prove yourself wrong, but all too often the self doubt is too strong and it can make people avoid certain situations, develop anxiety in others and can even cause professional sportsmen at the top of their game to 'choke' and lose the match.

An inner critic delights in attacking those who strive for perfection. Research shows that perfectionism can sabotage work, school and sporting achievements with negative implications for health, including stress and burnout. The constant need to achieve against unachievable standards is a remedy for failure and fuel for the critical fire.

So how can you tackle your own inner critic and prevent it putting barriers in your way to succeed?

1. Perfectionism only leads to procrastination

"To err is human". And the way that we learn and evolve is through making mistakes. The only way to make a mistake is to try. Ask yourself this question... "What can I achieve if I'm not perfect?" or even better "Who can I help if I'm not perfect?"... Everything and Everyone?

2. Focus on the AR in SMART

Goals should be Realistic and Achievable. If you set your sights too far out of reach, you will either talk yourself out of starting in the first place, or berate your lack of achievement when you struggle to meet your exacting standards. Strive to be better, not perfect.

3. Start listening to the angel on your shoulder instead of the devil

Think of all those times when an inner voice has told you 'You can do it!'. As children, our inner dialogue is positive and creative. We have a desire to explore and experience new things and it is usually the rules of others that hold us back, not ourselves. When you achieve success, celebrate it and enjoy some self praise. Positive thoughts disempower your inner critic.

4. Use your successes to motivate you, instead of a fear of failure

Take some time to reflect on everything you have achieved in your life. The reason you are where you are now is because you have succeeded. You have overcome adversity many times over and it is this belief that should drive you.

5. Depersonalise the inner critic

When you hear that voice in your head, whose voice is it? If you can conjure it up right now, see if you can change the voice so it sounds like Mickey Mouse. Speed it up. Now try and turn down the volume, so that it's so quiet you can barely hear it. And then, see if you can move it far away from you so that it sounds like it's coming from a great distance, perhaps echoey, like it is on the opposite side of a vast cavern. It doesn't matter if you can't do all of these things, but hopefully it will show you that you can control this voice.

Next time that your inner critic makes an appearance, see what happens when you change it. You will begin to disassociate with it more and more until it no longer feels part of you. Take on board any constructive feedback and put the critic to bed once and for all.

Every hypnotherapist loves the question "Do you have a swinging watch?" because it provides an opportunity to give some more insight into our profession. I was asked this very thing by a friend over the weekend and as it happens, thanks to a free gift from a recent course, I was amused to be able to say that I do!

Do I use it? Of course not. Thankfully times have moved on and I can also pack away my black top hat and cloak...

So what is hypnosis and how does it work?

Hypnosis is a relaxing state, similar to how you feel in that half hour before going to sleep, but unlike sleep, you are fully conscious and aware. To achieve this state, focused attention is required, which is where the swinging watch once played its part. Now most therapists use just their words and tone of voice to get the same result.

When you enter hypnosis, your subconscious mind becomes more receptive to suggestions and you can make profound changes that can help you overcome issues such as quitting smoking, weight management, phobias and anxiety.

Think of a time when you've complimented someone and seen that 'Yeah right' look on their face. They are consciously rejecting your compliment because they don't believe that it's true. The same thing happens when you tell yourself that planes are one of the safest modes of transport, but you still feel paralysed, shake or perspire if you have to board one.

Hypnotherapy can bypass this filter so that the suggestions can be taken on at the subconscious level and change your beliefs so that they better serve you. It's a comfortable, easy way to achieve your goals.

And remember, they are only suggestions!

Any suggestion made by a hypnotherapist is just that. They are not instructions and it is entirely up to you whether you take them on board or reject them.

When hypnotherapy clients come to me for help with motivation, I’m always thrilled to see how they achieve their goal with such vigour and momentum. It’s also interesting to see how effective management of one area, such as work, healthy eating or exercise quickly spreads to other aspects of their lives. I was recently given credit for a client’s ‘sparkling home’!

If you find yourself procrastinating over priorities or troubled by To Do’s, then the following tips may help.

1) Utilise ‘Wasted Time’ in your day

Identify your wasted time and use it more effectively, eg,

Daily Commute – read books, listen to audiobooks if driving, or do something for self development. Alternatively use this for your facebook / news time ONLY as it’s time constrained.Half hour before going to bed – clean and tidy and prepare for tomorrow.

2) Set a To Do list

This is an essential way to start the day with all tasks in one place. Once you have your list:

“Coffee Stamp” – Add something that you’ve already achieved and cross it off. It’s a cheat, but like the ‘free’ stamps on your coffee loyalty card, you trick yourself into feeling that you’re already part of the way there.Know your ABCs - Just like Triage, assess your list as A (Important, Urgent), B (Important, Not Urgent), C (Not Important, Not Urgent). Nail the A’s, progress the B’s and put the C’s off for a rainy day.Don’t be Superman - How much time do you have in the day and how long does each thing take? There’s nothing more demotivating than feeling like you haven’t got anywhere against your overly ambitious plan.Address the Unexpected – when the unexpected happens, re-prioritise. Always come back to and revise the list as that makes it stronger and more achievable.

3) Use a Motivation Anchor

This is a clever tool from Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP). Close your eyes for a moment and think of a time when you felt truly motivated (getting your team to the top, setting a PB at the gym, passing an exam or your driving test).

Once you have a time in mind, imagine yourself back in this time, see what you saw, hear what you heard and feel what you felt. Once you have fully immersed yourself in this experience in your mind’s eye, dial up those feelings – make the colours brighter, the sounds louder and the feelings stronger, as if you’re turning up a car stereo. When the emotions peak, firmly press your fourth knuckle on your left hand and then release.

This ‘anchors’ in that feeling of motivation so that any time you need some inspiration to get going, you can press this point and reconnect with those positive feelings. Repeating the above process periodically makes the anchor stronger.

4) ‘Bank’ what you’ve achieved in the day

At the end of each day, prior to going to bed, reflect on the successes. Even if your To Do list is not completely done, mentally ‘pay’ the Bank of Self for everything that you have managed to do. Bigger tasks pay better! Your mind acknowledges this positive reinforcement and sets you up to do it all again tomorrow!

Many of us have experienced stress in our lives, whether it be going in to an important exam, waiting for someone important to call you back, or the first day at a new job.

Sometimes small concerns and worries can spiral and quickly consume our waking thoughts. Over 2 million Australians suffer with anxiety and this can manifest in many ways, including headaches, neck and back pain, insomnia, IBS and panic attacks.

Here are a few simple steps to help you regain a sense of control over your mind and body and bring stress levels back to normal.

1. Control your breathing

When your body is under stress, your breathing becomes more rapid and shallow. To control your breathing, focus on making your out breath longer than your in breath (breathe in for a count of 5 and out for a count of 7, or whatever is most comfortable for your normal rate of breathing).

2. Breathe into your belly

It is important to breathe into your abdomen, so place your hand on your stomach and ensure that it lifts as you fill your lungs. This will help to balance the levels of oxygen and carbon dioxide in your blood and reduce levels of stress hormones

3. Use Peripheral Vision for relaxation

Focus on a spot directly in front of you and slightly above eye level. Continuing to look at this point, allow your eyes to relax and start to take in what’s either side of the point, widening your vision and taking in as much as you can in the corners of your eyes.

Peripheral Vision activates the parasympathetic nervous system, the part of your nervous system that calms you down.

4. Relax your jaw and your shoulders

Concentrate on relaxing your jaw and your shoulders, which in turn will allow relaxation to flow throughout your body. Our jaw and shoulders carry most of our tension when at stress, so releasing these will encourage a state of calm.

Anxiety keeping you awake at night?

If anxiety is leading to insomnia – either through an inability to fall asleep, or waking and being unable to fall back to sleep – here are some steps to follow:

5. Set a bedtime routine / ritual

Go to bed at the same time each evening, avoid electronic devices and stimulus for 30 minutes prior to sleeping

6. Unload your thoughts

Keep a notepad at the side of your bed and prior to settling for sleep, write down your concerns, thoughts and actions and set them to one side to deal with in the morning

7. Use positive self talk

The Law of Attraction means that if you think ‘I’ll never get to sleep’ then that’s what will happen. Instead, say to yourself ‘I will have a comfortable sleep which will allow my body to get the rest that it needs’. Not everybody needs 7-8 hours of sleep a night, so take the pressure off achieving this.

8. Take time out of the equation

Set an alarm (if you have to), but put your clock out of sight so you stop monitoring time awake or asleep

9. Use Peripheral Vision to relax back to sleep

If you do wake, use Peripheral Vision to relax your mind and body and return to sleep